ZAP!

This last week the electrical company cut power to the house because, supposedly, a bill hadn’t been paid. I mean the most literal sense of the word “cut”, though “hacked” would really be an even better fit. After a rather exhausting day at work I came home to find a bunch of wires hanging from the side of the house. Actually I found the mangled wires the next day since it was 6pm when I first found out there was no power, which is way too late to start poking around the house for possible causes. I spent the night alone by candlelight… romantic, I know. Now I’m fine with no power, but the problem is when city-houses-that-are-set-up-to-have-power don’t have power things get complicated (complicado: this is what people say when things are a pain in the ass, as in “a situação é muito muito complicado//the situation is very very complicated”…. other words, like “difícil”, come off a bit strong, I learned this the hard way, so even when the situation is more than complicated it is better just to stick to “complicado”). When I don’t have energia I also don’t have water, because to pull water from the well I need an electrical pump, and there are no neighborhood communal pumps (that is what the villages have), no river, nada. My romantic night sozinha was briefly interrupted by my guard (the older guard was working that night): “We have no power” “I know we have no power, I noticed just now when I got home, I’ll figure it out tomorrow when the offices are open” “But I am suffering out here in the dark” “Okay…. I understand that the situation is not ideal but there isn’t anything I can do about it right now because it is night” “But the water tank doesn’t have much water” “I know, I also need water from the tank, I am frustrated too” “But how am I going to see the robbers” “Listen extra carefully, be alert” “But we have no power” ……… I’m really too tired for a cyclic conversation…….. The next day the university kindly started figuring out things with the electrical company, four days after the payment was made my house was reconnected and six days after payment was made the electrical company left the electric bill on my front porch, the very one that supposedly hadn’t been paid in the first place…. Ah, gotta love the order of things: cut energy for an unpaid bill, and then, many days later, actually provide the bill to the customer, but don’t forget to charge them those reconnection fees.

So I’m back to normal: wearing rubber flipflops when I cook with my stove…. or else the current grounds from the hot plates through my body…ouch (don’t even think about stirring that pasta water with a metal spoon), following the strict rules of what I can plug in when (oven + computer = blasted fuses), and not touching things like the ends of plugged in cords or the CD drive on my computer (ouch, again). I wonder how many times the human body gets zapped before your nervous system starts getting wonky.